THE VOID STARES BACK

As my job search has been more than unsuccessful and at the same time mostly nonexistant, most of my time seems to be spent on the internet. Or, more accurately, on the small online game I am a moderator for.

Neurogalaxy is not a particularly complicated game by any stretch of the imagination. Most of the concepts within the game aren't especially new, and even then it's very self-explanatory. At the same time, though, it's aimed at a demographic that was never particularly intelligent.

Part of my duties as a moderator is to answer Help Tickets, which is exactly as it says on the tin. The other staff members- the artists and programmers- are busy having wild parties and actually getting paid, so most of the tickets are handled by the moderators.

I'd like to highlight some of the more insane ones that have been posted. Some of them I've actually wasted time answering, others I've just closed outright. Every single one, though, is utterly ridiculous.

This is the best thing anyone has ever said to me. I actually kept it in my ticketdesk for a while, unanswered, because I loved it so much.

I was going to answer, "I found it, it is inside of my head" but I didn't on the off-chance this person was actually a ghost and saying that would make them haunt me in my sleep. It made sense at the time I was answering this, which in retrospect was pretty late.

Unfortunately, my fellow moderator and part-time piece of pie found this gem first. He was courteous enough to send it to my desk so I could see it, though. We're currently planning a yard sale of all this user's items so we can afford to take over the game and hopefully move foreword with it.

At first I assumed that this person was confused by the fact that the game is set in a world created by several gods and goddesses. Then I remembered that to find out this information, you would actually have to actually READ the words on the screen.

???